Chris Partridge

Texas Board of Education Revises Textbooks: Slaves were ‘Unpaid Interns’

DALLAS — The Texas Board of Education has drawn scrutiny in recent years for its efforts to revise its curriculum to favor more conservative-friendly versions of history and science. After revising textbooks last year to emphasize Christian influences on the Founding Fathers and introduce Intelligent Design to biology classes, the Board voted nine to zero […]

Is Halloween Turning Your Child into a Socialist Parasite?

The Devil’s Day is upon us once again, my friends. But the real danger of Halloween is neither the razor blade in the apple nor the scantily-clad co-eds harlotting up our fair streets. It’s high time somebody un-MASKED Halloween as the Socialist Nightmare it truly is. I’ve been saying it for years, but did anybody […]

Republicans Outraged by Violation of Men’s Privacy

“The Obama administration has shown appalling disregard for the privacy of American citizens,” said architect of the abortion ban Rep. Trent Franks, R-Ariz., at a press conference Thursday. “Looks like it’s up to Congress to rein in government once again.”

U.S. Demands Syria Massacre Its Citizens the Old-Fashioned Way

WASHINGTON — The Obama administration had harsh words for Syrian President Bashar al-Assad Monday, demanding that if the repressive tyrant was going to massacre his own people, he had better do so without the use of chemical weapons. “We will not stand for the senseless killing of Syrian civilians,” Secretary of State John Kerry vowed […]

Entire Mall Cringes at Opening Notes of “Santa Baby”

CINCINNATI — It’s that time of the year again when the corridors of America’s malls and public spaces fill with Christmas music. But not all holiday carols are welcome. The shoppers at Cincinnati’s Northgate Mall reportedly uttered a collective cringe Sunday as the opening notes of “Santa Baby” came over the loudspeaker. “Ugh, it’s so […]

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