Trump Jr.: “My Russian Meetings Prove I’m A Real American That Knows How To Create Opportunities And Fake Advantages”

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When Donald Trump Jr. decided to publicize the emails setting up his now-infamous meeting with a Russian lawyer to obtain dirt on Hillary Clinton, the repercussions were felt strongly and swiftly in the White House. “This is sum of all fears stuff. It’s what we’ve all been dreading,” an unnamed White House aide told The Daily Beast. That same official also claimed they are considering hiring an attorney for “purely precautionary reasons.” Condemnations of Trump Jr., President Donald Trump’s oldest son who now controls much of the president’s real estate empire, didn’t end with his actions. According to the Beast’s report, this controversy has, for many White House sources, solidified a “vanishingly low” opinion of the president’s junior.

Contrary to the prevailing opinions within the White House, Trump Jr. doesn’t seem bothered one bit by the controversy caused by his recent move. “It was to be expected; I know what Americans are thinking and what they expect us to do,” he said. “However, I also know that our people value results above all else. In other words, one can hold moral, honor and the rest of those ideals in the highest regard; if they’re only there for show, he’s not going to have a good time on the job. On the other hand, if you do even the most heinous and desbicable things for the sake of results in this country, Americans will forgive you for it. This has always been a country in which the end justifies the means and that makes me proud to be an American.”

He continued, “Don’t get me wrong – even such questionable behavior has its limits. I would never betray my country; however, I am more than willing to go the extra mile and do what others won’t in order to prove that my father didn’t put me in this position for no reason. Therefore, my Russian meetings prove I’m nothing more than a real American that knows how to create various opportunities and fake advantages. What’s more, I’m not only good at creating them; I excel at using them in ways that guarantee that this country prospers and that my father feels pride because of the fact that he has fathered a son who’s willing to go to such lengths to prove himself. I am proud to be my father’s son and I’m sure he feels the same.”

“And unlike Hillary Clinton, I’m not afraid of baring myself in front of my people. I’m not afraid of owning up to my actions and admitting to what I’ve done for this country. Hillary Clinton ran away from everything she’s ever done for America; she still, to this day, pretends like the whole email server thing never happened. That’s not the true mark of a winner; it just proves she’s a coward. Well, not me. I stand here proudly and announce that I did have meetings with Russians in an attempt to dig up dirt on Hillary Clinton. And I’m not afraid to admit it not because my dad happens to be a billionaire, but because it’s the right thing to do. And I would have done it all over again. Because, this country deserves it and these people deserve it. If that makes me a bad person unworthy of being called Donald Trump’s son, then so be it,” Trump Jr. concluded rather heroically.


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